I know, I know. It's not really based on reality and most would likely agree that it's not stellar television. Part of the reason I enjoy it is that I love learning about people and getting into their lives. (Yes, that's the social worker in me.) The other reason is it's generally pretty mindless, and quite frankly, I sometimes need to shut my brain off and watch some mindless television.
Years ago, I became sucked into the "Real Housewives" franchises (yes, multiple) on Bravo TV. For the most part, the show has been a way to escape day-to-day drudgery and the homes and obviously different lifestyles were so far removed from my life that I couldn't relate. I could watch without getting sucked in and it could stay mindless entertainment that I could laugh at (and sometimes, laugh at while rolling my eyes).
But I have to admit, the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills managed to suck me in in a different way. The last couple of seasons, one of the cast (Yolanda Foster) has been bravely coping and fighting Lyme Disease and the impact that it's had on her life has been featured on the show. Chronic Lyme Disease can be debilitating, and it's changed her life in drastic ways (which she addresses on the show). For the most part, her friends seemed to rally around her, and then...
Someone accuses her of having Munchhausen's Disease. Now, Munchhausen's is classified as a mental disorder where the individual makes themselves ill in order to gain the attention of medical professionals and others. (It's quite a bit more complicated than this explanation and is extremely rare. In fact, there are some in the mental health field that deny that it exists and that all of the symptoms should be classified as Malingering.) But, in reality, what this person was suggesting is something that everyone with Invisible Illness faces--"I don't believe you're sick."
One of the reasons this individual brought this up was because of the photos Ms. Foster posts on Instagram (which includes selfies of when she is ill and receiving treatments and alternatively, when she feels well and is able to enjoy her life). I found myself yelling at the television as if I were watching a sporting match.
Here's the thing. Those of us living with Invisible Illness are sick. Some of us advocate and educate. Ms. Foster is brave enough to post photos of herself when she is ill and receiving treatment as a way to advocate and educate, and continues to be part of a cast on a reality show. I write a blog, train professionals how to work with individuals in the mental health field who are living with chronic pain, and provide mental health services to individuals with chronic pain. Others create memes and t-shirts to raise awareness.
But we are also people. We are people who have lives and enjoy having fun. We do not always want to be sick. We do not want to always live in the illness. We want to be normal. We have interests outside of advocating and educating and being ill. On good days, we can even enjoy some of those interests. It does not mean we are faking our illnesses.
A list of medical definitions in my medical chart.
